Energymania II: Monster vs. Red Bull vs. Rockstar vs. Full Throttle

So here’s my current Top 3:

  1. Monster Khaos – The spelling hurts and it doesn’t taste as good as Full Throttle Fury. On the other hand, it has 40% less sugar, which I’m guessing is why it out-buzzes FTF for me. And the taste is far from awful — there’s very little of the sulfuric aftertaste in this one, instead it’s more like a chewable vitamin that’s been melted down and slightly carbonated.
  2. Full Throttle Fury – This is the only energy drink whose taste is actually bona fide *good*. To me. It’s like a high-sucrose orange soda with an adult-style kick to it. ‘Course, as mentioned, it’s exceptional in the sugar category, which I *think* dampens its energy-given qualities, but still, it really does taste good.
  3. Rockstar Juiced Guava – I don’t think it has the buzz effect of regular Rockstar, but on the other hand it doesn’t taste like cream soda and rotten eggs.

After those three there’s a big gap. Regular Monster, Red Bull, and Rockstar are tough for me to choke down. Eh — that’s probably too harsh, but they don’t taste that great and the energy kick doesn’t seem to be any better as a result of the weird taste. I was once a big fan (a month and a half ago) of regular Rockstar Juiced, but something in it started giving me indigestion, which has taken the shine off the experience (despite tasting okay and having a good energy contribution). I don’t get how Red Bull managed to fuel this energy drink boom — the taste seems too odd for mass appeal to me, although it’s essentially the same flavor as regular Rockstar and Monster.

Other Full Throttle variants — Regular and Blue Demon — aren’t bad tasting (similar to drinking an acidic Mountain Dew and a highly carbonated green apple Jolly Rancher, respectively), but they’re too acidic for my mouth to deal with. I end up with a sore tongue, similar to when I eat/drink citrus. Which is odd given that I’m not sure an actual fruit juice has ever come within a mile of either of those variants. Unless agave’s a fruit now. Neither delivers more energy than Fury, though, so there’s no sense in my spending much time worrying about Regular or Blue Demon when there are better options available.

For the sake of expressing the totality of my experience, I’ve also experimented with Amp Energy Overdrive, which to me was extremely similar to drinking a Code Red. Nothing wrong with that, but it didn’t seem to have any of the extra impact of a “true” energy drink. Also tried something called “Daredevil” once, but it tasted as bad as anything and had the smoothness, character, and packaging timidity of a down-market me-too product.

I’ll keep updating as events warrant.

bkd

Energy Drink Challenge: Monster vs. Full Throttle Fury

The quest for the perfect daily beverage-as-drug continues. The last four days have witnessed my first encounters with both Monster and Full Throttle Fury. Next week, Cocaine! (Actually, I think they got forced to change their name. Oh well.)

pic_monster.jpgMonster: Tastes like someone melted every flavor of Jolly Rancher ever conceived and then mixed it with an equal part off-brand cough syrup. It tastes sweet yet awful. It also was the harbinger of my worst energy day since the start of the experimentation — I was dead on my feet (or in my chair, I guess) at 11:30. (However, it should be noted that energy swung back up in the warm glow of a lunch at the Thai place off Muirlands.) Also, I’m not sure whether the Monster may be to blame for my only getting 5.5 hours of sleep Friday night — although in fairness, this lack of sleep didn’t seem to have a particularly damaging effect on Saturday’s activities or energy level. (OTOH, it might have had one had I spent all day Saturday going to meetings and answering emails rather than honing my furniture-making skills.) Finally, Monster has the plus/minus of including the word “taurine” prominently on the top part of the can, which, if glanced at too quickly, leads you to believe that the drink contains, rather, “urine”. And the flavor doesn’t do much to dispel that thought.

pic_fullthrottle.jpgFull Throttle Fury: The taste is not awful — it’s like a very sweet orange soda with chemicals in it, which makes it probably the best-tasting so far. As for the effects, the Full Throttle Fury has been consumed on the weekend, so it’s difficult to compare apples to apples here. There was a slight energy lull midday yesterday, but it’s difficult to know whether that can be attributed to the drink’s potency or to the aforementioned short sleep night on Friday (or to a cumulative effect of multiple consecutive days of self-dosing). But between the Full Throttle and Friday, I was actually asleep by 12:30 last night — sans melatonin. So, yeah, I’m totally screwing up the scientific nature of this study. Sorry.

So, while sample sizes aren’t large enough to be truly deemed significant (heck, this isn’t a decision about *war* or anything), here’s my rank order thusfar:

  1. Rockstar Juice — best energy, tastes okay, lists quantities of active ingredients.
  2. Full Throttle Fury
  3. Monster

Thx,

bkd

(Yes, another title with a colon in it. I’ve gotten over worrying about it. For now.)

Experimenting with Drugs: How Alternating Doses of Energy Drink and Melatonin Have Kept Me Alive Another Two Days

One big upside to having a widescreen laptop is that you can do ridiculously long blog post titles without getting to the end of the input form. Just FYI.

The last couple days I’ve been dosing myself with Energy Drink in the morning (8 oz./morning, Rockstar Juice variety) and then loading up with melatonin to get myself to sleep at night. Two days in and I’m not yet seeing the downside — although, if memory serves, I should probably be watching out for the inevitable onset of Red Bull breath. I’ve been wide awake the last couple of days (seriously — *me*, *awake*!) and slept fine enough at night — although I’m still not sure if the dream-appearance of my shadow aspect should be considered a positive or a negative. Meh. If it’s feeling under-served, it’s gotta be positive that it got its licks in, right?

Gonna try some different brands for the next couple of days. Loaded up with Full Throttle, VitaminWater Energy, and some other brand I forget. I can’t tell if the stuff tastes as off as it seems to — it’s not Tahitian Noni bad, but it’s in that direction — or if I just shouldn’t drink it right after brushing my teeth.

Excelsior.

bkd

(And if I die tomorrow of respiratory failure, I hearby bequeath my military stuff to my newphews and my work shirts to the DLF. Heck, if I die any time in the next *seven* days, that probably still holds.)